Four stages of a gambling addiction
When it comes to gambling addiction, there are four common phases we have or will have gone through: winning, losing, desperation and hopelessness phases. TW: discussion of suicide.
The first stage of a gambling addiction is the winning phase. We all had some sort of win or winnings that got us hooked. For me, it was a few years earlier when I was on a family vacation in Vegas. I did not gamble as much then, usually only in Vegas which we averaged about once a year since right before my grandpa passed in 2017. I put $20 in the Stinkin Rich video gaming machine at Planet Hollywood, a few spins later, I was able to double that to $45. Now that does not seem like a huge win but it was enough to get me hooked and started my love of Vegas. The idea that you could put in as little as $20 and come away with double that is what got me hooked. Since then, I started playing the slot machine apps on the phone and watched Vegas influencers youtube videos of them playing slots at the various casinos throughout the city. When it came down to sports betting, my biggest win was probably $2.5K early on. I won that amount one time after betting on MLS over/under goals scored. We have a sense of optimism thinking we can replicate our biggest win and better yet, maybe even more. Rarely ever does that happen. This then leads to the next stage.
Then, the losing happens. You think you can win more. So what happens? You start betting more, and more. Eventually, what goes up, must come down. Your luck starts running out and you start losing more than winning. You'll probably win some here and there but it will be more like the $45 I was recently content with over the $2.5K I was ecstatic about. We keep chasing our losses by wagering or playing more money in the long run to win less than expected. We started lying to our friends and family about our usage just so they do not find out how deep in the hole we really are. We keep telling ourselves “this is the last bet that is going to make us rich!” But then it does not end the way we imagined, so we continue the same cycle of placing a bet or going to the tables to beat the house. The house rarely loses. The biggest losers are us compulsive gamblers thinking we can finally win big.
Once we continue losing, eventually we come to the third stage, desperation. We start to lose control over our actions. We continue medicating our underlying conditions anyway possible. We started selling anything and everything to find money to try to partake and make those $10 into $100. We start feeling ashamed and guilty of continuing our poor habits but feel it’s the only thing that will make us happy in the moment. If we do not gamble, we start becoming irritable, and upset for no reason. At this point, the signs of a compulsive gambler are noticeable. If you notice this with one of your friends or loved ones, this is the time to have them seek professional help. At this stage, it is not too late to turn their life around.
Hopelessness is the final stage of compulsive gambling. The point past rock-bottom. This stage is the heaviest out of all as we sometimes feel like we do not belong on this earth anymore. Sometimes the shame and guilt of this disease starts to become more of a burden on us. We think the world would be better off without us, that all our problems would be gone if we were not here. If you get to this point or are currently at this point please know, you matter and what you are going through matters. It is said that problem gamblers have the highest rate of suicide amongst all addiction. In a 2022 systematic review conducted out of University of Helsinki, they found that suicidality was high with those that gambled at harmful levels. It ranged anywhere from 22 -81 percent with suicidal ideations, while 7 to 30 percent attempted. The more severe the gambling, the higher the rates were (Marionneau and Nikkinen, 2022).
Please know there is light at the end of the tunnel. There is hope and ways to get help. Recently, 988 is a hotline you can call, text or visit their website (988lifeline.org) or 1-800-273-8255 (National Suicide Prevention Hotline) to support people in a crisis or feeling distressed. Another hotline to contact 1-800-GAMBLER (AreYouReallyWinning.com). They can get you in touch with professional help and talk you through your issues with compulsive gambling. Kurt Dahl, recovering gambling addict, writer of the book “Gambling Addiction: A complete guide to survival, treatment and recovery from gambling addiction and problem gambling” suggests taking a 3 x 6 index card and writing these thoughts on it:
1-800-273-8255 (National Suicide Prevention Hotline)
This will pass
My brain can not be trusted right now
I will live today
For now, I will IGNORE IGNORE IGNORE
1-800-273-8255
It gets better. One day at a time.
My advice for those who want to change:
Delete the sportsbook apps.
Forever, do not re-download
Self-exclude yourself.
Asking a gambling venue to exclude you from the venue or a gambling activity offered by the venue.
Lifetime ban, if not the maximum years
If you have a loved one, they will be affected by it in some way, come clean to them about what you are doing. If it gets pushed back and not talked about, It could be worse in the future.
Gambling addiction is one of the most secretive addictions out there, stop hiding from your loved one and tell them EVERYTHING
Attend a GA meeting (online or in person)
Find a therapist that specializes in addiction.
Make better habits
Hit the gym
Watch what youre feeding your mind
Nutrition
Social media
Books
YT videos
Read books
Learn about the gambling addiction
When you learn enough and change your mindset, you will eventually understand why you started in the first place. There are often underlying issues that contribute to gambling addiction.
If sports gambling is the main culprit, STOP WATCHING SPORTS
Watching sports for us compulsive sports bettors is the gateway drug.
Delete all sports apps
Unfollow all sports teams and fan pages from social media
Give control of your finances to a trusted person
For gamblers, seeing money in a bank account could increase the risk of gambling, thinking we could turn that $100 in the account to $1k is not the right mindset to have.
If you have a line of credit, cut up your credit cards, close the accounts.
Marionneau V, Nikkinen J. Gambling-related suicides and suicidality: A systematic review of qualitative evidence. Front Psychiatry. 2022 Oct 26;13:980303. doi: 10.3389/fpsyt.2022.980303. PMID: 36387006; PMCID: PMC9645554.
